Vulnerability

As I face the loss of my best friend to divorce, the consequence of my misdirected attempts to hide my vulnerability, I am struck by truth of Jesus statement that the tighter we hold life, the greater the likelihood we will lose it.

I badly wanted to be loved by my sweet spouse for just me - failings, weaknesses and all. I wanted it to be alright to show emotion, express doubt at times in my own abilities and questions about faith. However, to our last days in the same house, I believed the lies from Hell - "protecting myself" from the prospect of rejection - pridefully believing I was disguising weakness for strength and insight. What a crock of crap!

On those few instances I was vulnerable, I was accepted on each occasion!!

Men, guess why God insisted we lead? Because we are dispositionally INCAPABLE of doing so effectively unless we give the responsibility back to Him realizing, "I cannot do this." He asked that we lead because doing so with any shot at success requires turning the job back over to HIM every morning.

BTW, ladies before you break something, guess why God ask that you serve in other roles? Because you ARE dispositionally suited to lead and if the task can be carried out without the absolute need for surrender, what results? Pride. Put down the glass vase. Move away from the ledge. Ponder the last two paragraphs before injuring yourself, anyone near you, or flaming me. Ponder (respond no sooner than 10 days). Back to the point at hand.

Who in your life are you hiding from tonight? Afraid he or she won't love the real you? Who has been vulnerable with you, yet you are withholding the same? Please, do yourself a favor before the chance is lost. Show them your heart. Tell someone you love, you feel honored to have a place you can go that is safe, failings and all. You will be blessed beyond words. Withhold it - trust me - you will feel both rejection and laughter as Hell mocks you for having traded pride as a counterfeit substitute for vulnerability.

He who would save his life must lose it . . .